Being a Better Husband

Being a Better HusbandI have women ask all the time how to get their men to be better husbands. My favorite question, though, is when asked by the men what is involved in being a better husband. Here are a few helpful tips:

Being a Better Husband

  1. Talk openly about your financesMoney surprises are never good, so stay a few steps ahead and include your wife in an ongoing conversation about the budget. This does not mean monitoring her spending.  It does mean that you don’t keep secrets, you value her input, and you make important decisions as a team.
  2. Make the effort to find out more about your wife- Do you know her favorite band?- What books did she read last year/is she reading now?-Where would she like to go if you had a three-day weekend?- What restaurant she’s been dying to visit?- Ask good questions, and then listen.
  3. Try some creative/imaginative ways to tell your wife how much you love her: Don’t assume she knows.  Even if she does know, hearing it from you will spark the fire. Before long you’ll realize that you love her more. Here are some tips: - Slip a card or love note into her purse at the beginning of the day.- Figure out obscure anniversaries (first date, engagement day, the day we moved into our first house etc.) and then make a big deal of celebrating together.
  4. - Leave loving answering machine messages when you know she’s not going to be there.
  5. - Make the bed and put a single rose on her pillow.
  6. - Run a bubble bath for her and keep the house interruption-free while she enjoys it.
  7. - Color a gaudy sign and put it on the windshield of her car. Find more tips here.

These are the practical aspects which wives appreciate and men get because of the concrete nature of this advice. However, there is some getting into the feelings too that men can do. Like love, respect, friendship. Here is a video that might clarify just what this means.

A word of warning by this author, that gifts whether material or in kindness, MUST be received by the wives in humility and love.

But sometimes too, some men become unkind because the wives become cold to their husbands’ kind gestures. In a certain town where I was teaching some years ago, an inmate of our house who was a husband to a beautiful lady used to give good gifts to her. Sometimes it was a dress or cake, or a necklace or some biscuits etc. These were given during the weekends. But the wife never said ‘thank you’ to the husband for the gifts given to her.

On one occasion, when the wife’s visiting friend jokingly scolded her for not saying “thank you” when some beautiful earrings were bought for her by the husband, the wife replied: “Ah leave me alone, have I sent him to buy me anything? If he has got money and he is spoiling it on gifts, how do I care about it”?

That sounded a little boorish, didn’t it? And the husband was greatly hurt by such attitude that showed ingratitude for all that he had given to her. And never did he give anything to her again. The wife should have received the gifts with joy and with a thank-you encouragement. For more information in this story, click here.

Being a better husband is a short trip as most wives love the attention that even the attempts bring. Next up – being a better wife!

About the author: By

Matt is the parent (along with his wife Julie) to five wonderful kids. He has been self-employed for 25+ years and is the owner of the How To Fix My Marriage website.

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Disclaimer: We are not psychologists, counselors, or therapists. We are a married couple that has had their share of challenges, and the techniques, tools, and programs we recommend on this site have worked for us on our journey.

Affiliate links may be used within this post for products we recommend. They in no way affect our judgment of said products, nor do they affect the price of the product.